Fifteen rounds with reality

There comes a time in all of our lives where we are faced with the brutal realities of life. That time where we look ourselves in the mirror and are unhappy with what we see. The moment when reality smacks you in the face with a 2 x 4 of truth. That unmarked crossroad of life where we stare down two roads: The road of righteousness and the down hill stretch of disappointment; only to remember that you forgot your map to help us decide which one is the correct road to continue down. That single instance that it hits you that this isn't what you're life is supposed to be like...cue sappy string quartet.

It could be the moment you catch up with friends about their upcoming job prospect that they were just offered. The quick glance at your Facebook news feed when you see seven new engagement updates, three side profile photos of that one time high school crush who is now expecting another bundle of joy or that one girl who always seems to have a new relationship update, while you sit by asking when is your time. That interview that you left thinking to yourself welp, not gonna get that one.

Funny how things work.

Sounds kind of funny, but that's when I turn to the likes of Rocky Balboa. What's even funnier is what I'm about to say, I believe that we all have a part of Rocky deep inside of us. We all have a little bit of the Italian Stallion ready to break free from the fenced in confines of our being. Now, if you don't know who rocky Balboa is, or understand any of the references, I apologize for wasting your time and want to save you another minute of your life as I suggest that you just skip on to another blog or on to something more worthwhile.

Rocky teaches us that you can go twelve rounds with any opponent in life. A rival, an enemy, addiction, heartbreak, death/ loss, anything. He proves that anyone can go toe-to-toe with any challenge and persevere through determination, dedication and a chip on your shoulder. Because like he said in Rocky Babloa "Nothing will hit as hard as life." How often we forget that.

I've begun to struggle with that a lot lately, especially with recent interviews and opportunities, frequent reminders of how "far behind" I am to most of my peers and how depressing it is to work part time at the same place I did in high school. Then it dawned on me - while watching Rocky IV - that everyone's journey is different. Everyone's path differs in challenges, terrain, obstacles, levels of difficulties, etc...cue Rocky Balboa training montage with groovy 70's and 80's techno music.

While some of my peers value a few years of hard work building a foundation at one job and some growing into miserable machines; I chose two full time stints, a summer gig in the mountains and part time opportunities just to seek out more opportunities to fine tune my skills and seek out a fulfilling trade. While some peers chose to actually embed themselves into corporate America; I chose to leave and find a personal purpose that will help protect me upon my return. As some married themselves to the one they love most; I chose a courtship with curiosity, an affair with adventure and a spouse in spontaneity...all three new to my life since graduating college.

All of our lives, although extremely different, are filled with similar stories, setbacks and sad truths. And if there is anything that I've learned from watching many Rocky Movie Marathons on Spike, it's that no matter who you are, where you're from, whether you're a rookie, a veteran, a has-been or a never-was-been we can all fight, we can all go twelve rounds, fifteen rounds or even twenty rounds...when fighting in the ring of life.

So in the words of Rocky Balboa we must remember:

"The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place It will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit, it is about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much can you take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!"

Ding. Ding. Ding. Round One. Fight.

Until next time...

Punching bag of truth

I ran into an old classmate not to long ago. We weren't friends nor would I consider this person, who I'll refer to as that guy, an acquaintance. I didn't know that guy, nor did that guy know me. Yet, all through high school that guy was nothing but rude and a bit of a bully.

I don't know much about that guy, nor did I make an attempt to, but I assume that it was that guy's friends that brought out his meanness, the pressure of fitting in and keeping with the "tough guy" image most likely provoked it...it doesn't excuse the fact that he was a royal ass bag.

For a long time now it's been my message to the teens and others around me that we shouldn't hold grudges and that we're called to forgive, yet I couldn't come to terms with. It was hard to restrain myself from going up to that guy and saying:" Hey dude, remember me? You were a jerkus back in the day and I can tell that you're doing quite well. You look healthy, maybe a good 35 lbs. heavier, your tats look great I'm sure the ladies love 'em and that's why you're not married..." or something like that.

It wasn't until I had been in the same room as him for a good few minutes that I convinced myself that I should strike up a conversation and get over myself, but decided it best to wait until next time since it would be weird to just talk as I'm about to leave.

My point is this, grudge or no grudge, having pent up frustrations or anger towards someone who was a royal Delta Bravo (DB) to you in the past and shunning him or her makes you no better than that guy. Look at any genuine difference maker in the history of the world: MLK, Gandhi, JC, George Washington, the list goes on. They all befriended anyone and everyone to continue on changing the world. It wasn't until today that I realized my inability to get over my selfish mindset towards a past forgettable memory makes me no better than that guy himself while being that guy to me all through high school. By being full of angst and anger makes me just as bad as the bully himself...and I'm better than that.

I'm sure that we've all been there. Stuck with a past fling, a former bully, a boss you can't stand, whomever that guy is in your life. It's time, in today's day in age, to get over ourselves and be that better man and become more accepting. That's the manliest thing you can do, especially in a society that needs more men to be men.

Happy Easter

The Romans had technological advances that would put the Industrial Revolution to shame...had they not collapse. The Chinese created a printing press before 0 A.D...but most didn't know how to read. Around the same time, they also discovered gun powder...but never gave guns to their soldiers. Humankind has potential, but ends up short in the end and doesn't always come through. Only one person has done it all and never disappointed...Jesus. Today he rises, after he died for our sins and even through death, he came through. Happy Easter everyone!

Batman ain't got nothing on me

Wouldn't it be great if life was easy? As if any time you were faced with a problem or an opportunity or find yourself standing at a cross roads a large arrow would appear and show you which path to take or even a cartoon-like figure would appear and in a Yoda-like way would guide you along the way.

Since I can't have God on speed dial, I'm looking for a sign...God maybe you could use the Matt Signal so I can see it and get it right. It would be our own special means of communication so when I'm lost or need answers, like now, you could use it so I know that I'm doing what you want me to.

...and what would the Matt Signal look like you ask?

I'm not quite sure, but it would be so much cooler than the Bat Signal. If I had to draw a picture it would shine brightly in the sky above me and would be an image of a large man with a Santa-like beard wearing a robe and sandals whacking a kid in the face with a 2X4 and underneath it, it would read something like: "It's me, listen."

Wouldn't it be great if it were that easy? But where would be the fun in life then if it were easy.

Until next time...

Your revolUtion begins with you

A couple of weeks ago I entered into a conversation before class with a few of the teens who had begun discussing the current issues facing our country. Rising gas prices, violence in other countries, increased unemployment, etc. The teens passionately shared their views and their hopes. The discussion was energizing. I proposed a question to the group: "Why don't you do something about it?" Their responses were typical of kids their age, and sadly the same most Americans tend to go with, and that is that they are not able to, are too young or not in a position to do such an act of valor.

I told them they were wrong. I said it doesn't matter how old you are, what you do, or who you are. If you don't act, who will? Write your Congressman, educate yourself and others, create a mini revolution, etc. They laughed at me, so I used it as a "teaching" moment.

I said: You know, Mary was your age when Gabrielle came down and told her about what was going to happen and she accepted. She was young and made a difference. We still talk about her decision today. A good number of our Founding Fathers were in their twenties and considered revolutionaries. The founder of Facebook is a college drop out and a bagillionaire...

The point of this story isn't to spark a revolution or even discuss current events. The world is a scary place. Society is scary. Life tends to suck and there isn't enough time to do everything we need to do, let alone want to do. The point is that when we look at our own lives we can do one of two things. We can sit back watch it go by, complain about how shitty it is, worry about tomorrow and try and get sympathy from anything or anyone that will give it. Or we can accept what's going on regardless of it being crappy,and make the most of it, then move on. A mini personal revolution.

I look at my own life. Just the other day I got the call from the job I anticipated would hire me. I had had two strong interviews and they made it sound like a done deal. The job that I thought I would have by the end of March, called to tell me that they were not going to hire at this time. Aside from that minor set back, I still live at home. There is no long term commitment of anything, and sadly anyone, in my life right now, nor is there anything concrete or clear. I could sit and sulk, but that's not constructive. I have analyzed my situation. I have reflected, worried, studied, prayed, freaked out and accepted everything...then I moved on. I have set out to apply for a job a day until I get something. Every "no" and every lack of response is just one closer to the one. I could be sad that I've batted 0-2 on the last two dates I've been on, but I've realized it's their loss and just makes me one more closer to the one. Writing, working out, hiking, and other productive tasks have taken precedence over worry, stress and the whoa is me mentality.

It reminds me of a story that I once heard about when the Master talked about a priceless antique bowl that was worth a fortune at a public auction. For years it had been used by a "tramp who ended his days in poverty, quite unaware of the value of the bowl with which he begged for pennies."

His disciples asked what the beggar's bowl stood for and his response was "your self!"

When they seemed puzzled, lost and confused, he responded with: "All your attention is focused on the penny knowledge you collect from books and teachers. You would do better to pay attention to the bowl in wish you hold it."

As we live our lives worried about tomorrow. Scared for what lies ahead. Nervous about where we are in our social standing, where we sit in the hierarchy of friends and if "we're where we need to be." We should really not dwell on nothing more than where we are right now. To become focused solely on ourselves, today, whether good or bad. We must accept what we know of our lives right now and work to make the most of it as we press on. Like the beggar we hold our own bowl that is worth more than anything in the world and must make the most of it and that's our own life that we get to live. We only get one. Live it today and worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes...just remember we can only control the next three seconds. One. Two. Three. Repeat.

Until next time...

Save Me - Teenager Statistics

Unfortunately, this is the sad truth of what it's like to be a teenager in today's world. Makes ya think a little bit about what is wrong and missing in our lives...

The not -so-"Churchy-type" don't belong in Church?

About two weeks ago I was sitting before Mass with a group of high schoolers from one of the youth groups I am apart of. As we quietly awaited for Mass to begin I over heard two senior girls begin to sounds disgusted at something. From my prayerful state I leaned in to listen to what had made them grown so miserable. The one girl began by saying and unfortunately I quote: "Oh my God what is she doing here?" I looked towards the side entrance and in came a young girl with her mother, most likely a classmate of theirs. The other girl, just as taken back by the sight of this girl at Church, replied back to her friend with "I know right? I cant believe she's here."

Now i pride myself on not being an overbearing, super scary, Jesus Freak, nor do I get worked up over much of how people respond to their faith as long as their seeking out a deeper relationship with the Lord. I leaned in and asked if everything was OK? Both girls shot back that that girl was not a the "Churchy-type" and "they can't believe she is here." I looked at them, a bit saddened and all together disappointed at what I had heard.

Now there were two parts to this that really chapped my tuckus. The first item was that these girls were judging a classmate openly while in Church and secondly, these girls claimed that this young girl is not the "Churchy-type."

After Mass I pulled the girls aside while we were getting food before youth group and told them (and I paraphrase):

It's not our place to judge anyone in our lives and we all often forget that. We're quick to judge someone for something we've heard, seen, etc, yet we don't like it when people do the same about us, so it's not fair to do it to someone else. There is only one person that can judge...and you're not Him. As for her not being of the "Churchy-type," I think we've forgotten the example Christ live for us. We see so often in Scripture JC hanging out with the sick, the beggars, the lost, the weirdos and wackos. He was such a righteous and loving man that He calls us to accept and love all people, especially those we hate, judge or can't stand. So if this girl for whatever reason is not what you claim is the "Churchy-type" than most likely she needs to be here and we need to help.

It's hard to imagine how easy it is for us to judge others and talk about them behind their backs. I'm guilty of that and unfortunately I "constructively" did it today about a friend of mine. Yet, many who do so are also the ones that claim to be faithful, spiritual and religious. We forget no one, not even me, is perfect. There only has been two people that lived such a pure, faithful life and again, we aren't them...in case you were wondering who I'm referring to...JC and his momma, Mary.

In the news, online and everywhere we've heard all the political crap going on, we've seen stories about the young man's death in Florida and the outrage and claims of racism, there continues to be murders in our streets, school violence and bullying. Yet, here we are living our lives in a world full of all this hate and judgement and at some point we fall into, some days more than others. We don't get it.

Life's too short to judge others and if the big guy can hang with those that are not the "Churchy-type" than I surely can strive to do the same, because no one, no one, can determine that they are better than the next person or more Holy. Some people who have perfect attendance at Church and pray daily still commit sin and still fall down just like anyone else.

This week I have challenged myself to not judge another person or speak illy of someone behind their back and I believe the world would be a different place if we all did this in our daily lives.

Until next time...