I Know I'm Not A Manly Man, Which Makes Me More of a Man Than You

The word man is defined as: One possessing in high degree the qualities considered distinctive of manhood(2)obsolete: the quality or state of being manly: manliness.

Many people have their own definition of what this word means and what it entails "to be a man." Others believe that they are the definition of what it means to be dubbed: a manly man. We envision that burly stead to have the swagger of Frank Sinatra, the charm of every Disney prince, the sense of adventure of Hemingway, Jesus' abs and discipline, the stories of the Dos Equis guy and the beard of Zeus or that of Allan from The Hangover. That's a lot for us men to aspire to, especially in an era that is calling for true manliness.

Last week at work I made a sad attempt of being a "man" by attempting (strong emphasis on attempt) to put together a bookshelf in my boss' office while she was out on vacation. The gigantic feat of masculine proportions was time consuming, horribly confusing and clearly suited for someone of much more exuberant manliness than what I brought to the tool box. It was an epic fail on my part and I fell victim to the manliness roadblock of an Office Max shelving unit.

As I reflected on the sad attempt of manliness I realized that I had been humbled to the tenth degree by such an easy task. I loathed the bastard bookshelf for hours as it stared at me every time I passed by her office door. It sat, scattered in her office, boasting its conquest over me as I'd pace by during the afternoon. It celebrated its victory over me each time an office member would walk by her office to see it sitting on the floor in pieces and come into my office asking how I was progressing with the project after I had raised the white flag in defeat.

It was then that I realized that one skill that trumps any attribute of what we claim creates "manliness," is humility. The ability to accept defeat, but press on. That moment where you can say I messed up or I am not able to do this. It is in humility that we are better equipped to forgive, to lead others and to move on from the hardships that arise, like failing at putting together a simple bookshelf. That was when I realized that I know I'm not a manly man, which makes me more of a man than you...But I'm still working on the humble part though, but aren't we all. I think another thing I'll work on in this New Year is my humility, because in the wise words of a dear friend, "I am the humblest person I know."


Until next time...